Email
Print
Feed
Are You the Gym Jerk? |
Tweet |
7 habits to avoid when working out
DR. SAN DIEGO
There are few places better in life (for me anyway) than in a terrific gym. So when I took my family on vacation recently at a great resort up the coast, I was shocked to run into an entire collection of “gym jerks” populating the fitness center. People with real “gym-itude.” Turns out it really wasn’t so bad … after all, it gave me something to write about. So here’s my thoughts on what I saw and what you ought to avoid whether you work out at 24 Hour Fitness, Pacific Athletic Club, Frogs, LA Fitness, Fit Athletic Club, Bally’s, the Y, or my fave, The Sporting Club. That is, unless you want to be an official “Dr. San Diego Gym Jerk.”
Let’s understand the psychology of “gym jerks.” It’s all about showing off, which, in turn, is all about being insecure, which, in turn, is all about thinking — erroneously — that what other people think of you will make you more secure. It won’t.
After all, how can what others think of you make you anything? Remember “sticks and stones will break my bones but names will never hurt me?” So if someone thinks, “Wow, that guy must be strong because he’s lifting so much weight,” does that really make you Superman? Besides, the bigger probability is that down deep, you won’t really believe the other guy anyway, which is why you will more than likely continue to engage in one or more of the “gym jerk” behaviors that follow — to make yourself feel better, without regard to the rest of us.
If you are someone who claims not to care what others are thinking about you, quit lying to yourself and consider this: If you are going to the gym for any other reason than to workout, what are you doing there? It sure isn’t to workout. It’s to get attention.
A popular song by Little Jackie declares, with no apparent sarcasm, "I believe that the world should revolve around me!" I see babies wearing bibs embroidered with "Supermodel" or "Chick Magnet" and sucking on "Bling" pacifiers. Future gym-jerks? Probably not. Future narcissists? Perhaps.
Since so much in the gym and bodybuilding subculture outwardly is about power and self-assurance, perhaps the opposite is really true — it’s about insecurity and weakness, and covering these up. There are many experts who believe that bodybuilding indeed revolves around an individual’s sense of insecurity and low self-esteem. Present your self to the world as a powerhouse and all that insecurity and low self-esteem is smoothed over. Or is it?
People who go to the gym for reasons other than to workout — to garner attention and lift their flagging sense of self-esteem — usually are guilty of displaying attention-seeking rituals. Yes, every gym has them.
Those who will do almost anything to make sure their presence is known. As if that will bolster your self-esteem. Sadly, it only backfires when you engage in the following behaviors.
First, there is Chat Guy/Girl. No, I am not interested in talking about your relationship problems, your fitness routine, your shopping successes, how much weight you are losing or gaining, or how hot the girl/guy on the next machine may be. Just workout!
Second is Mr. or Ms. Scream. No, we’re not impressed how much weight you are lifting or pushing. If it’s so hard you can’t keep your pain and yelling to yourself, have you ever thought of lifting in your garage?
Third, how about Hurlman? You know this one. No matter how much weight he’s lifting, he’s got to send the weight after his last lift crashing onto the floor, scaring the you-know-what out of the person next to him. No, we’re not impressed with how much you lifted. We think you are pathetic.
Fourth on my list of real gym jerks has got to be Stinky. C’mon dude, ever hear of a shower? This character smells offensive on the way into the gym. Who wants to sit on a bench after Stinky gets off of it, leaving not only sweat, but human sewage? There ought to be a law against this gym jerk. Nothing narcissistic about this fellow.
Fifth has got to be Hitman. We’re not talking a mobster for hire here. We’re talking about muscle man flexing his biceps, throwing out his best pick-up lines and basically annoying the heck out of women who just want to workout and get out … and get away from this gym jerk.
Sixth is the No Wiper. We all sweat, but we don’t all wipe. Relax, I’m talking about wiping the machine we just finished using. Please wipe. Do you enjoy lying in someone else’s sweat? Gym jerks don’t care. Maybe they think their sweat doesn’t stink?
Last is the Curser. Must you really use every curse word if you can’t finish a set because you loaded too much weight on the bar or put the pin in too low? This goes along with the Screamer and, when combined with cursing, it’s just plain offensive. Yet a 2006 survey conducted by the Associated Press/Ipsos found that 74 percent of Americans acknowledged they encountered profanity in public frequently or occasionally, and 66 percent agreed that, as a rule, people curse more today than 20 years ago. While not everyone swears, field studies indicate that those who do curse utter 80 to 90 taboo words per day, out of an average of 15,000 to 16,000 words we speak daily. It seems gym jerks bring 85 of them to the gym.
The United States is currently suffering from an epidemic of narcissism. Merriam-Webster's dictionary defines an epidemic as an affliction "affecting ... a disproportionately large number of individuals within a population," and narcissism more than fits the bill. “Notice me,” “make me feel better than I feel I am,” and make me feel special” is what the gym-jerk is really saying.
There you have it. Seven sure fire ways to become a real gym jerk. I’m sure you can add to this list. Please feel free to — just not at my gym.
Do you like what you read? Subscribe to San Diego Magazine »
Comments posted here do not necessarily reflect the views of the byline author or San Diego Magazine. Keep your comments civil, stay on the topic and your posts will remain online. Comments that use foul language, ethnic slurs or sexually suggestive language will be deleted. Posters who continually harass others or disobey the rules will be banned permanently from commenting on this Web site.
Reader Comments:
Hey Dr. Mantell, this is one terrific take on gym behavior. In your delightful style that I've now come to expect, you humorously expose the rude actions of some "gym-jerks" at the gyms I work out in, in Mission Valley and in Carlsbad (not mentioning the name of gym).
I almost lost a toe once when a monster working out next to me dropped -- on purpose, I'm sure -- 90 lb dumbells at my feet! I'm not a particularly hot gym babe, and was not impressed at all. Now I see why he did what he did. I used another descriptive other than "gym-jerk" -- mine is unprintable. Thanks again doc for putting a smile on my face and understanding in my head.
I am one of those body-builders you described and I gotta tell you, you described me perfectly.
I'm not a rude guy at the gym, but I have to be honest with myself and tell you that I do think some of my size makes me feel more confident and builds my self-esteem.
When I was a teenager, I wasn't exactly a 90 pound weakling, but I sure wasn't the most secure guy in my neighborhood either.
Body building is a great way to build yourself up, not just physically, and I encourage people to give it a try and get fit -- without being a gym-jerk. But be sure you know what you are doing, so get a trainer!
Thanks for your honesty and even helping me look at myself.
Hey doc, I could add and add to your list of signs of being a gym-jerk...
how about the guy in the locker room who insists on taking the locker right next to you even though there are dozens of empty ones all around the place...What a jerk, right! A
nyway, you understand the gym pretty darn well and make it fun to read about.
By the way, I work out in the 24 Hour Fitness in Carlsbad and I love the place. It's not the fanciest, but it has everything I need and as long as I'm getting in shape and staying fit, it's perfect for me. Sure we have our share of those huge muscle guys, but now I now what makes some of them tick. Sure is interesting.
Another interesting blog doc! I'm looking forward to reading what comes out of your head each week here...I'm a gym freak(not a gym-jerk) so this week's spin is especially relevant. I work out next to a woman who sweats like a you know what and NEVER wipes up after herself...same in the locker room...it's really disgusting. You have your finger on the pulse of the gym-jerk all right. Between the guys who think the gym is a pick up place, and my sweaty gym-mate, it's amazing I am getting in the shape I am -- but there's no better proof than how healthy I feel. Keep it up!
For all the reasons above, I do not Do the gym thing. I could find dozens of reasons I should, but losing weight, self esteem, making friends... are all things you do when you are happy and not depressed. I guess depressed people attend... but why? Being depressed is so much easier, and you can just sit and do nothing. Last time I was in a gym I was a junior in high school. That was 1968. I've met gym jerks.. married one or two.. but the evidence that my loathing of anything physical is clear by my mid section. I would rather jump off a bridge or run into traffic. No, that would be too painful. I guess I could flip
Bill W. the finger and down a bottle of Vodka and a little bottle of white things... no then the insurance wouldn't pay.. .my dad's french poodle ran out the front door 15 years ago and got run over by a car.. that afternoon, he swallowed a shot gun. Maybe a day at the gym would have made his day better.. doubt that... to 'gym' one needs to feel good inside. The jerks that show up seem to want to 'steal your thunder' but all they want is attention. I can sit here and get all the attention I want by just telling my story. Yes, it is true. Why on earth would I lie about stuff like this. Get up every day and Gym in your shower... do something, anything, to make you feel good about YOU. Otherwise, stinking thinking gets into your head.. and yes, it can kill you. Better idea to go to the gym.. and laugh at the jerks!! Or just find humor in your own tragedy and send it off to a great blog post.
Do gyms still have wood floors?>? lol Peace my friends. Gym it up!!
What about the jerk who doesn't where shoes? I used to work out at the San Diego Tennis & Racquet Club and there is a guy who works out without shoes! Who does this? I submitted a complaint once and they didn't address the problem; as if I was supposed to confront the shoeless jerk myself. Even the trainers didn't address the shoeless jerk. His feet were all over the machines. I had to leave this club because shoeless and I had the same gym schedule and I just couldn't deal with this anymore.
This is the first blog that I read from Dr. Mantell and based on this I will read his comments on everyday life whenever he writes. Although I haven't encountered all of the 7 types he mentioned, the no wiper is of particular annoyance to me. Thanks Dr. San Diego for your take on those with gym-itude.
What about the gym grunter! When I go to the gym there is one guy who always makes all these crazy sounds while on the treadmill. Even with headphones on listening to tv or my ipod I can still hear him!! One time the sound got so bad everybody turned around and we all saw the guy fall off the treadmill, it was unbelievable and defently memorable after that fall he was quiet at least for the rest of that days workout.
I'm at the gym at 5:30 every morning...so it's not too crowded. But almost every morning...without fail...when there's a sea of open elipticals, someone inevitably hops on the one right next to me! It drives me crazy!! Those people are definitely gym jerks.
LOL...the sea of open gym equipment and someone picks the one right next to you. I hate that!
There's also the gym flatulator...I'm not talking crop dusting. This is the guy who just breaks wind like he's at home while on the treadmill in front of you. Then, the gym fans pointing spread the goodness to everyone else.