Faith, Hope and the Charity Ball

A century of faithful tradition, along with an emphasis on keeping up with the times, is behind the planning of the Charity Ball. This month’s celebration of the event’s 100 years draws on the wisdom of multiple chairmen from previous editions.

THE SLIGHTEST CONTRETEMPS about the conventions of afternoon tea—a frisson of uncertainty, nothing more—occurred one day last November as the Earl Grey quietly steeped at the Point Loma residence of 1979 Charity Ball chairman Karon Luce. At 2 p.m., 1989 chairman Yvonne Larsen reported from the dining room that the question had arisen, “Is it proper to light candles on the tea table?”

The consensus in the living room: No, it is not. Etiquette bans candlelight during hours of full sun, since the flames would appear wan and frail. 2001 chairman Sandy Walrod contributed a further refinement. She noted the requirement to char the wicks of the candles spaced among the spread of dainty pastries and sandwiches (some filled with cucumber, others with egg salad and irresistible curried chicken). It would seem a candle with a pristine wick looks as insincere as skim milk simpering in a sterling cream jug.

Such are the niceties of Charity Ball traditions, but commencing in 1909, San Diego’s longest-running event always has been as up-to-the-minute as the year in which it took place. Flappers at the Charity Ball? You bet—and there probably were flasks of bathtub gin, as well, at some 1920s editions. When the ball resumed in 1946 following a 10-year hiatus during the Depression and World War II, its theme, unsurprisingly, was one of gratitude for the nation’s victory. In the early 1970s, the new social conventions that challenged old ways resulted in San Diego’s unquestioned personification of the old order: ball founder Lena Sefton Clark, grandly leading her party from the ballroom when she found the entertainment offensive. As one veteran recalls, it had something to do with go-go dancers and skirts deemed way too short.

All the balls since 1912 have been held at the Hotel del Coronado, except in 1922. In early years, balls started late in the evening and continued with dancing and card playing into the wee hours, interrupted at midnight—or later—by a festive supper. Nowadays, most guests attend the Crown Room dinner, which commences at 6:30 p.m., and some are home snoozing before the dancing concludes at midnight. The Charity Ball keeps up with the times—and with bedtimes.

Tea for all, and all for the Charity Ball: The majority of women admiring the miniature lemon shortbreads on Karon Luce’s dining table were former ball chairmen, a group that collectively is chairing the Centennial Celebration, the 100th-anniversary Charity Ball. On February 14, the annual gala benefiting Rady Children’s Hospital & Health Center commences to the strains of “The Blue Danube,” the music that in most years opens the festivities in the Grand Ballroom. The Past Chairmen’s Tea is indispensable among the events that preface the event, yet while the genteel afternoon paid homage to other days, the participants looked unblinkingly to the future.

Those San Diego families who have attended for generations might find it impossible to regard the Charity Ball as breaking new ground. Yet even though it was founded in 1909 to fund the long-ago Holly Sefton Memorial Hospital for children, the ball qualifies as the trend-setting social event of 2009. No other fund-raiser in the history of San Diego has approached such age, and while a few annual galas are venerable, none yet has reason to commence planning 100th-anniversary parties.

The Charity Ball is accustomed to making history, and will do so on Valentine’s Day this month as it dances past that magical 100-year marker. Despite the economy, proceeds are expected to significantly exceed those of previous galas, to the benefit of the under-construction Patient Care Pavilion of Rady Children’s Hospital. Even as it luxuriates in the glow of such historical significance (candles will burn at the Centennial Celebration), plans have been laid for the launch of Charity Ball’s second century. In 2010, longtime committee member Marlene Shook will chair the 101st-anniversary ball.

In the genealogy of local events, the Charity Ball traces its bloodlines to many of the city’s oldest families and is known particularly for its unrivaled ties to Point Loma and Mission Hills. Ball founder Lena Sefton Clark famously was followed 62 years later by her daughter-in-law, Mary Clark, who chaired in 1971 and will attend the Centennial Celebration. Dulie Ahlering and Alison Gildred, fourth-generation members of the prominent Frost family, are the only sisters to have chaired the ball. Leading family names constantly recur on the Charity Ball committee list, which may be San Diego’s closest claim to a formal social register.

The event also regularly looks to newcomers for talent. One of these, 2005 chairman Carol Chang, is among the three chairs steering the Centennial Celebration and was named one of the 50 People to Watch in 2009 in the January issue of this magazine.

“I really was the new kid on the block when I was asked to chair,” Chang says. “Many did not really know me, or whether I knew which fork to use, as I was so new to town. And yet the support of all was just there, really wonderfully there. This, I think, is the essence of why Charity Ball has lasted so long.”

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