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7 Pitches We Had To Reject This Week

A graveyard for wacky press releases.

Like a DVD extra for deleted scenes, we’ve got a web exclusive dedicated to all the products and ideas we were pitched this week but couldn’t use. Take a gander:

1. Nanny management. A La Jolla “manny” named Nick sent us his new web site that allows you to manage "the help" that manages your child. Way to encourage the already remote, hands-off parenting style of so many WASPs (no offense, Mummy!).

2. Vaska’s Herbatergent™. This mouthful of a product name describes an all-natural, botanically-based laundry care solution for your delicate swimsuits. Say the name 3 times fast! Available on Amazon and at Target. 

3. Whale yoga. Next Generation Yoga promises this new twist on the ol’ meditation class is “sure to be oceans of fun,” complete with whale snacks and a Whale Yoga composer. It's probably peaceful, if not educational, but we're not sure we want to be reminded of large, lumbering mammals while burning calories. But if whale yoga floats your boat, it’s happening on Saturday at the Ideal Hotel.

4. Owie pillow. Those nasty seat belts can cut like a knife. (Or in one staffer’s case, they can really wrinkle the ruffles on a Vince silk blouse!) Cry no more: “The Owie Pillow is an abdominal pillow for a motorist wearing a safety belt.” Developed by a San Diego mom, it retails for $35.

5. Annual Rare Fruit Plant Sale (April 23 in Balboa Park). This one is for all the jujube and goji berry aficionados. Did you know: “San Diegans can grow many types of exotic fruit including jujube, white sapote, feijoa, dragon fruit, mango, longan, jaboticaba, tropical guava, passionfruit, goji berry, excellent bananas and ice cream bean among others.” Yessssss.

6. Miss California works at IHOP. Apparently Miss California Arianna Afsar is “flipping for kids,” which is super noble of her, but it’s surprising she’s not doing venues any larger than this particular breakfast chain location, situated between an Islands and a Costco. Does no one care about Miss CA anymore?! Anyhoo: March 1, 2011; she’ll be serving from 9:00 a.m. to 12:00 noon, IHOP at 2169 Fenton Parkway, #10, San Diego, CA 92108.

7. An Annual St. Pugtrick’s Day Party. This one is just a little random. “Pugs and their parents” are invited to celebrate St. Patty’s Day on March 12 in Coronado’s Tidelands Park. There will be green soda and green tail painting. Now…some of us may or may not have attended a cat’s birthday party back in the early '90s, but are animals really expanding their horizons into celebrating Irish-themed holidays?

Wasn’t that just…WOW? Okay, tell us in the comments which one is your favorite, which is actually useful, and what product or event you are secretly going to buy or attend.

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